GROWING PAINS

“I do not think that I will ever reach a stage when I will say, “This is what I believe. Finished.” What I believe is alive … and open to growth” 

- Madeleine L’ Engle

In the summer between 9th grade and 10th grade, I hit my growth spurt.  I swear I grew 4 inches that summer.  And let me tell you it was painful as all hell.  I remember sleeping and being woken up by what felt like my body being ripped apart.  Not fun.  But I grew and topped off at about 6 feet 1 inch.  Ok, fine, I’m 6 feet and 1/2 inch (they couldn’t just give me that last 1/2 inch, heaven forbid!).  Anyway, you know where I’m going with this.  Painful? YES!  Worth it? YES! 

The reason I’m writing today is because a few days ago I went through another growth spurt, spiritually speaking (no, not that last 1/2 inch, HEAVEN FORBID!) and it hurt.  It hurt real bad.  It made me question everything. I’ll admit it, I went dark.  I needed help.  But even after all the growing I’ve done, I felt that I didn’t need to ask for help and still go at it alone.   I have a terrible poker face and everyone kept asking what was wrong with me.  Arggghh.  Just pissed me off more.  Well, after the cleaning lady at work asked what was wrong, I decided to finally ask for help.  I got it!  I was ready.  And because of that I was able to dig to my core, rip out all kinds of wacky stuff which enabled me to see the blocks that had been inhibiting my growth.  My major block was trust.  But we can talk about that one over a beer sometime.  Here’s my point, we all need help sometimes.  We just do. However, it’s kind of frowned upon in our society.  It’s seen as weakness.  Some people don’t want to be judged as “broken.” For me, it was my ego.  I mean I write the BGE!!! (BGE=Bryce’s Grand Experiment, just in case you thought this was Perez Hilton).  How crazy is that?!?  Well, it’s all Poppycock!  In the end, we are all human and we ALL need a shoulder to cry on once in a while. We need to grow. We can’t do it alone. 

Being strong, true strength, is asking for help.  Because let me tell you, that is a hell of a lot scarier than going down into the darkness alone and thinking YOU don’t need anyone.  Strength, is admitting you need help.  I didn’t have that strength, at first.  I needed the cleaning lady, her name is Femiola by the way, to point out that I was a shade darker than death for me to get it.  ASK FOR HELP! Therapy, energy work, God, singing, a friend, family, the Universe, a loved one, ANYONE!  Because you know what help is? It’s improvement.  That’s it.  It’s nothing else.  It’s just you asking that your life move in a different direction because the current direction just ain’t cuttin’ it!  Improvement! I MEAN, WOW! Who in their right mind doesn’t want to improve and grow to a new way of being.  Think of it like this, a pro football player has a TEAM of people helping him.  They are there to answer questions, heal him, carry him, love him, advise him, strengthen him.  He gets help in every facet of his life.  He has a TEAM of people working to better him.  He is getting better because of his team and he probably loves asking them to better him.  We are no different! Why not build a team to help you.  Who is your team?  We can grow so much faster if we surround ourselves with people we can ask help for…our TEAM.  That. is. strength!

THE QUICK AND DIRTY TASK: Ask for help!

The What: Our lives are too precious to not get help.  We are growing and shifting and falling and getting the crap kicked out of us.  It’s absolutely beautiful.  But to go further, we have to get help. We have to break out of our comfort zone!  We need a TEAM. 

The How:  When you finally can’t do it alone, then you know you’re ready. So ask.  Go to someone and say, “I need help. Please.”  That’s it. 

The Why:  Because we are worth it.  It takes a lot for me to ask for help. Even when I know about being vulnerable, fearless, open… It’s still hard. However, when I now ask for help, I get excited.  I’m going to grow!  I will be completely different than I was before I received help.  How cool is that!  Look at this blog, this is all from me asking people for help.  Some were advisors, mentors, healers, family, books, whatever!  But it was help. And now I get to process it, put it in my own words and hopefully on some level help with these posts.  And hopefully you will do the same.

Also, for me, there are times when I ask for help by shouting out to God/Universe/Source/Love/Creator/Energy and I say, “I just can’t do this alone. Please help. I need help. I’m ready. Thank you. Love Bryce…the guy who is 6 feet and 1/2 inch tall…also, if you could throw that extra half inch in there too, that would be swell.”