I had an epiphany the other day. It came to me during a Qi Gong class I take every wednesday taught by my friend and mentor, Paul (quick plug, www.pkalexander.com). Before this epiphany, my mind was wandering. Fears, worries, life was pouring in during what should be a moment of mental stillness. And I asked for help to shut my yappity mind off for like 30 seconds. Then magically, stillness. And like a horse hoof to the face, I understood what I needed to know, AM I ALL IN? Am I all in? I had never really thought of that. Well, that's a good question. It's one I must ponder for a sec. Am I all in? So it is with great trepidation but excitement that I say, "By God, I AM ALL IN!"
So what is "ALL IN?" I'll tell you what it is, IT'S LIFE. Are you all in for this life? Are you IN for being present. For not worrying about the future. For loving with all your heart. For giving it your all. For helping your fellow man. For allowing yourself to be vulnerable. For taking risks. For making HUGE mistakes. For being a hero. For being a coward. For being afraid. For not backing down. For backing down. For knowing when to say ENOUGH or NO. For knowing when to say YES! For when you stop pretending. For being YOU. FOR BEING YOU!
And YOU may be a dark, brooding giant piece of poo one day (I was yesterday). Or YOU may be one giant ball of excitement. YOU may love suffering (big fan of that one). YOU may be a drama queen (another fave). YOU may give so much of yourself that YOU forget about YOU. And believe it or not, whatever YOU is, by going ALL IN, you finally get to see where true balance exists. Going ALL IN is the scariest thing in the world because we think we will lose ourselves. Ohhhh but it's the opposite, it's where we find ourselves. That's the balance. Where you get to indulge a little bit and come back to a centered, quiet mind. You get to see what boundaries you can push and then return to YOU. It's when we live in the extremes that we are actually not ALL IN. It's when we favor one side for another that we are only a small percentage IN.
So when you feel fear creeping up your spine, when you feel the woes of the world peeping in through your morning window, you say, "Hey, bub, I AM ALL IN! Why don't you go bother some poor schlub down the street. I'm going for broke on this life."
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