The dip. We all have it.
It usually comes after pretty intense time. It could be the weekend after a tough week at work. Or right after the holidays. Before vacation. After a big project.
Will is engaged. Momentum is kicking at full steam. There is a trajectory. We are all in.
And then...a dip. Some time off. A weekend. A week. Rest and relaxation.
The momentum we had, poof, out the window.
We tend to eat worse during the dip. Drink more. We stop working out. Meditating. More TV. Social media. News. Whatever.
So when it is time to get out of this dip, it truly is a bitch. Like pulling an elephant through a mud pit.
This is why so many New Year's resolutions fail. The weeks leading up to it were the dip. Food. Parties. Excess. And don't get me wrong, that's all good.
But we do need structure. We do need a plan that takes us through the dip and can place us right back where we left off.
This is why morning routines are so crucial. No matter what, they should never succumb to the dip. EVER!
It forces a consistency through any situation that allows for faster recovery and reset.
Begin the day.
Yours can be much different. I have to have these 5 things in place ALL the time or else this guy will go far off the rails. It's just who I am.
So, if there is a dip coming up, a weekend, a trip, whatever, continue to hone and commit to your routine. It will save you an immense amount of time when it's time to get back to work.
The dip. We all have it.
Every major teaching out there says the Self is the key to a life fulfilled.
Go inside. And BE it.
It's as simple as that.
Ha, I wish.
And why? Why is it so hard for us to take time become silent and introspective. To shed the outside world and just be? To really drop the chaos and bullshit?
The reason is because our society has made it extremely difficult to do just that.
The amount of external factors in our lives has increased at a staggering proportion. And because of this it forces us to rarely go IN. We are perpetually being pulled OUT.
Emails, work, texts, ads, TV, social media, meetings, newest that, must have this, fomo, guilt, shame, success, money, everything.
It's not that we need to live in caves and meditate for the rest of our lives. It's that our center. Our core. Our Truth, should be priority number one. WE should be number one. And from there see the world as it is.
Decide how we want to interact in it. Choose to engage these outside world from a place of power, not fear. Not "have to." Or "should." But from, "Yes!" and "I want to."
Nothing may change and everything may change. The actions may be the same but the awareness and center of strength could totally be different. Imagine that.
One of Self. Not smallness.
There's this interesting moment that happens when I'm taking a cold shower...
I call it the "Holy fuck/ why am I doing this to myself/ have I lost my bloody mind" moment.
It's that exact moment when the cold water comes into contact with my skin.
And in that moment a spiral can happen. Thoughts, anger, pain, greyness, basically a shutting down of my power.
However, if I can catch this moment, drop it, and breathe into my belly, the moment passes and I hit a fluid state. I then open to it. I unclench my muscles. Lean into it. And find where my body can expand.
Cold water, yes. Suffering, no. There is no story. There is no freakout. It's a moment of holding silence while an external force, as uncomfortable as it is, is interacting with my body.
I bring this cold shower example up because life is no different. We all have our versions of cold water. An external force coming into contact with us. Painful at first. An emotional reaction next. But after that it is our choosing how and what we want to do.
Spiral? Freak out? Or hold the position? Breathe into it and expand.
Catch the Holy Fuck and choose what comes next.
Being a coach/practitioner/mentor/advisor/consultant, whatever the terminology, is a very unique position to be in.
It allows you to see the depths of someone's soul. To fight for it.
But it also requires commitment, on both ends. It requires accountability.
Not only that it is crucial to catch the areas of life that hold them back. The parts that are unseen. Unowned.
And it's also a chance to turn up the heat. How much can this person stretch. How much of their wanting is there. How to do it. All while being aligned with who they are. Not just some standard formula.
The beauty in this is optimization. Time. Thoughts. Feelings.
The more we become optimized to who we truly are, the better our lives. The more fulfilled.
And if you fill unfulfilled, are looking for MUCH MORE, please find that support system.
Find someone who has ruthless compassion to optimizing you to be your best.
It's not weakness. It's actually the strongest thing a person can do.
As a wise man once said, "I've never seen an olympian win a gold medal without an incredible coach."
Time for the gold.
I was recently having lunch with a very good friend of mine.
We were talking about this endless thirst. Hunger. Of never being satisfied in life.
And while this drive or way of being has worked to get where we are now, it has its limitations.
For one, it's exhausting. The constant chase. The constant desire to prove.
And the second, it's never fulfilling. The thing we fought so hard for never scratches the itch. Like being perpetually thirsty.
Once we realized this we started to dig a little deeper and we came to the conclusion that it was like trying to fill a cup with a hole in the bottom of it.
And the problem with this is we are desperately trying to find the next substance to fill the cup as opposed to plugging the damn hole.
But why? Because most of us don't know what the damn hole is! It's easier to try to do what we know best. Do more stuff to fill the cup.
As we saw this it became clear that the "stuff," the liquid we wanted to fill the cup with could take any form.
A new job. New partner. New cars. More money. More success. Bigger house. Harder and longer work.
Always looking for that next big thing. The next thing to throw into the cup praying it will work.
But alas, it never does. And it never will. As long as the hole remains.
So, if you find yourself relinquishing time, money, happiness, and energy to the pursuit of filling a cup, I advise that you check the bottom first.
There could be a hole that needs filling. It will save you a fantastic amount of time.
And what is the hole? Well, it's for you discover. It's inside. Waiting.
Plug the hole, fill the cup.