Where does this ideal thing come from? Is it yours? Is it something you came up with? Is it something that you went inward and searched deeply for and came to a conclusion that this IDEAL thing was truly what you wanted.
Was it shaped, contorted, judged, fixated, grown, shamed, guilted, created, colored, molded, manipulated, by someone or something else?
Something not you.
Ideal doesn't really exist. Or at least what I've come across. And I have to say 9 times out of 10 what I thought was ideal was not. Especially when I got it.
Ideal to me is inside. It's internal. It's responsibility to self. With no manipulation for the external.